I have done what I came to do.
So, this is my story. I’ve been singing in choirs since I was 3. When I was 5, my Dad bought my Mom a piano. She would play hymns by ear, and I would do this (bang upper keys). Finally, when I was 7, she said, “Jim, we need to get this kid piano lessons.” I am grateful for my piano teacher, Mrs. Iler, for introducing me to the world of piano. This was the first song I learned (demonstrate). By the time I was 11, I was playing piano for Sunday School. At 16, I became pianist for the church, accompanying a 150 voice adult choir, and directing my first group of singers from our high school youth group. Watching our church director, I would echo her work at home. She would begin preparing the choir for a huge Christmas cantata every September. I would rehearse with my sisters at home after school, preparing for a Christmas cantata for our parents and grandparents, complete with a candlelight processional coming down the stairs. Thank you, Mrs. Malone, for teaching me the elements of drama and music to create a special worshipful experience. In high school, my Director Gilbert Jackson opened up a whole new world of music to me in a capella choir, our madrigal group and our men’s group, sharing a wealth of styles and eras that made me love singing and music even more. Mr. Jackson is still around, and conducting the Jackson Chorale in Michigan. Please don’t tell him I still have my music folder and some music. It was he who inspired me to study music in college and choose it as my career.
Beyond my home church, I had the opportunity to work at four different churches in Michigan. One job was bittersweet when I was pushed out because the minister asked me if I was gay. Upon moving to Tucson, I submitted my application here. I had just missed the deadline, but you called me anyway. I was the last to interview and was hired in August of ‘95. I’ve had the honor of a lifetime to work for and with Denny, Deborah, Bill, Heather, Owen, Shelly, Bill, (interim interim?) , Kelley and Jessica. I carry with me so many beautiful volunteer musicians through all these years. I’m grateful that you embraced ALL of me with open and welcoming arms.
Today Shelter sang Show Me the Way. Wende approached me quite early that first year, wanting to sing that number as a solo. What?! A rock song in church as part of worship?! I was horrified! But, because of that moment, and so many others to follow, I learned that if we pay close enough attention, we can catch a glimpse of the divine in anything & find it anywhere! Thank you, Wende. It is in this place that I was allowed to grow in my faith and as a musician. Through all of the workshops and conferences of ACDA and ADM, I was able to take what I learned and apply it in practice. Before my arrival here, I never played a handbell, never improvised on the piano, never played the organ.
I will take with me so many fond memories - Christmas and Easter cantatas, the choir performing full Requiems for Good Friday, the grandeur and drama of Christmas Eve concerts and candlelight services, our Christmas parties with Sharon Flint leading Silent Night (I still miss her so much!). She made every effort each Sunday to try to get me to laugh in worship. I cherish the time in the recording studio with her as she made her first album. I loved the picnics on Mt Lemmon, the working retreats we shared and grew as church, the chili cookoffs, vacation Bible school, our annual celebrations as church, Easter sunrise bundled up in winter coats & gloves, Easter Sunday snow, talent shows, drama club with Kelly & Shannon & Mike & Kathy Lindsay, hikes, Shelter outdoor concerts & Sunday brunch, & choir potlucks. I have developed a long term relationship with our Baldwin grand piano & will miss playing her very much. Thank you, Shirley, for this most generous gift that has brought me so much joy.
Thank you for embracing possibility and creativity - with your blessing, we brought food truck nights & welcomed neighbors, had deep and meaningful conversations through Theology Pub, basked in the beauty of a Sunday afternoon concert series, experienced quiet meditative services through Friday night Sacred Space. We built raised bed gardens and created a pollinator garden. We sang Christmas carols in senior homes and through our neighborhoods. You’ve allowed me to design and create entire worship experiences, write liturgy and music, create meaningful prayer stations, allowing us all to respond to word and song. And then, after learning from Suzanne Castle and Andra Moran, totally redesign our contemporary worship service.
You have always been there for me. From the start. You knew that I was gay and it didn’t matter. When I wanted to pierce my ears, Denny and Deborah said, go for it! When I wanted to participate in choral conferences, you made it possible. When I experienced a devastating break up, you were there. When tragedy struck my family one Christmas, you stood by me. Thank you, Bill and Heather, for being there for me. Thank you, Terry, for covering for worship. When my Mom died and her church abandoned her, you were there. Thank you, Bill, for being with my sister & me when my Mom left us. Thank you, Denny, for leading a beautiful worship to honor and remember her. Thank you, Terry, for playing, Thank you, Wende, for singing. When Carlos and I finally got married, you were there. Thank you, Owen, for leading such a beautiful moment for the two of us. Thank you, for the cards, for the notes, for the gifts, for the hugs, the kind words, for the parties all these years. Thank you for letting me honor your loved one by being part of their celebration of life.
Thank you, bell players, for giving me so much joy! I have had so much fun playing with you & talking with you! Thank you, choir, for leading worship in meaningful and beautiful ways through the years. Thank you for your willingness to try new things and for the joy you always bring in worship. Shelter, you will always hold a special place in my heart. I was brought here, in part, to start a new worship with a new sound. You totally took on the challenge. We have learned and grown together, loved together, created together. I have especially loved our collaborative times where we could create something special together - whether it be art or songwriting, creating a theme for a season, or designing worship elements. We have literally grown up together! I’ve had the privilege of being part of Roma’s wedding, and marrying both Andrea & Tim! What a thrill that has been for me! For many, many years, Wednesday evenings have been the highlight of my week! It has been pure joy for me to make music with each and every one of you!
As church, if you have been moved by a song, a cantata, or a worship experience, I have done what I came to do. In return, I have been blessed beyond measure to witness how you move & live in the world. It has been the honor of a lifetime to serve you all in this place. This was never a job for me, but a calling - to create the best worship experiences together, as a team, hand in hand. I didn’t do any of this alone. You were all here with me.
I know, I know. Shirley and Rob, Lisa, Dave - you’ve all told me time and again that I needed to be in this role forever. But, after much thought, prayer and conversation, the time has come for me to start a new chapter. I’m excited, I’m anxious, I’m sad - I’m feeling all the feels, even much more than I expected. So, I ask for your continued love, and I ask for your prayers as I take the next steps on my journey.
